closed ][ text to lila zacharov

[ambitionist]

[IN RUSSIAN. but i'm too fucking lazy to do an entire thread in russian so sorry emz.]

how does the serenity prayer go? grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference? and not choke a bitch? [wis 14 for that ftr.]

Comments

1/2

[ambitionist]

change of plans. we found the russian equivalent of lindsay lohan and i guess she's actually an asset to the knights????? talks big, doesn't do shit. she's coming with us. that's why i need the serenity prayer. and a nice long fuckfest with adonis like you have no idea.

[ambitionist]

what do you mean current mo???? doppelgate???

[bittersweeter]

Ew. How is being useless an asset? Don't answer that it will probably piss you off. Doppelgäte imploded. Bye bye doppelgänger, Elena let him out and they traipsed off to who the fuck knows where and I spent the whole fucking night looking for her like a good little girl but we found shit. I left you a voicemail. If you hadn't texted me that picture of Adonis I was going to start flipping out because I hadn't heard from you.

[ lila doesn't believe in timezones okay. she doesn't sleep, timezones don't apply to her. she's leaving nyc out for right now. ]

[ambitionist]

[yeah if she mentioned nyc right now he'd probably have a meltdown and that's ... just the spice of life this mission needs!!!! not.]

haven't had time to listen to shit, little busy right now in the eye of this clusterfuck. seriously though? what the fuck

[bittersweeter]

Shit got very real very suddenly. Tell me about the mission.

[ DISTRACTION TECHNIQUES ARE A GO. she's kind of... worried about him. no, shut up, not at all. ]

[ambitionist]

i found the decanter we were after and was working on getting it out from under glass when loki appeared. as in literal norse god loki. then he took it and natasha and fucked off to russia.

[bittersweeter]

What the actual fucking fuck? Didn't he fuck a horse?

[ambitionist]

[knowledge: mythology and shit????? 16] i think so? i think he was the girl horse too. that shit is fucked up

[bittersweeter]

That's disgusting. What are your sisters' names?

[ambitionist]

victoria, natalia, and sonja. why

[bittersweeter]

[ FOR REASONS, JFC. ]

I'm running out of Russian names for aliases. What about your mom?

[ambitionist]

anna.

[bittersweeter]

All that Russian, you're going to fit right in, Alexander.

[ambitionist]

i'm hoping we wont' have to fit in. you know, get in, curbstomp loki with thor/adonis's hammer, get out.

[bittersweeter]

1/2

[ambitionist]

LOL cute.

[ambitionist]

we're traveling ... through the internet. wasn't there a kids show in the 90s that did that shit? like oh boy, now you're surfing the net! only it was literally surfing? nevermind you weren't even born yet. kill me

[bittersweeter]

Fuck you I was born in 95. What's Rebecca's last name?

[bittersweeter]

Wait, like magic? [ brb hunting down zero. DONT TURN HER FAMILY INTO ATOMS. she saw a movie about that. it ended in death. lots of death. ]

[ambitionist]

don't fucking tell me that you're making it worse. Özsoy. and yeah, magic. what the fuck else would it be, blues clues??

[bittersweeter]

Blow me. I know the fucking technomage in the castle, Alexander, he owes me. Do you want to wind up as atoms that get sucked up Lohan's twat because you were rude to me?

[ambitionist]

if it's THE technomage in the castle he's probably the one wynn is electing to do this shit in the first place.

[bittersweeter]

Hence why I am hunting Zero down to make sure he doesn't fuck up your pretty face.

[ambitionist]

wasn't worried about that until now. i don't know what i'd do without friends like you

[bittersweeter]

Die probably. This is what you get for going to Russia without me.